I’ve been writing about beauty and skincare long before I needed to take my own advice — throughout my 20s, 30s and even in my youthful 40s. I didn’t have gray hairs or varicose veins to think about. Still, despite being thin, I grew up in the Age of Twiggy, and in those younger days I did obsessively pinch the skin at the side of my waist which separated my upper and lower torso. I performed this ritual at least a dozen times a day.
And although I finally overcame that fixation, I was an early adopter of facial fillers in my 50s which I continue to use until this day.
Still as I get older and there are more signs of my aging — wrinkly knees, “bat wings” that hang off my arms, sun spots from too much unprotected fun in the sun — it can be easy to feel insecure. With social media reflecting a cultural obsession with unattainable beauty standards, it can be a struggle to accept the natural changes that occur over time.
Sure, true beauty goes beyond what we see in the mirror — but that old adage can be hard to believe. Nevertheless we can learn from a number of celebrities who are leading the way in challenging what it means to be beautiful as we age:
Actress and model Andie MacDowell, 66, who let her hair go gray; Pamela Anderson, 57, who I think looks more beautiful than ever now that she’s shunning makeup; Diane Keaton, 78, Diane von Furstenberg, 77, and Lauren Hutton, 81. These aging icons who regularly post pictures of themselves, wrinkles and all, seem to be having the time of their lives.
When my friend, Felicia, was asked to pose in her underwear for a fashion website a few years at the age of 84, she jumped at the chance. “How many times at this age do you get to do something new?” she said. And esteemed photographer Rosalind Solomon, 92, recently published A Woman I Once Knew, a book of images in which she is naked throughout the years.
It’s revelatory and frank and the confidence it took to take — and to publish those photos — is inspiring. Solomon does us an enormous service by portraying this sentiment — this is what aging looks like, and it’s okay.
The first step to feeling comfortable in our own skin is to reframe how we view aging and physical imperfections. It's important to remember that wrinkles, gray hairs and other so-called "flaws" are simply a natural part of the human experience. They are not something to be "attacked" or eliminated, but rather marks of a life well-lived. Each line on our face tells a story — of laughter shared, wisdom gained and experiences cherished.
Rather than trying to fight the aging process, we can choose to embrace it. One effective way to do this is by practicing self-acceptance. Look in the mirror each day and affirm the things you appreciate about your appearance, rather than focusing on perceived flaws. Make a conscious effort to avoid harsh self-criticism and to silence that inner voice that tells you you're not good enough.
